I just don't understand

I am a single mother with a new divorce on my shoulders. I know that i am not the only one out there in this type of situation but i just don't understand some of the choices that are being made??

My son's father decided to move 1000mi. away when Max was one month old; i let him decide that knowing that i was not going, or following. So knowing the choices that he has made I am a little more than hesitant to say "Sure come on back into my life". I know that he is Max's father, and i use that term loosely, however I am his parent and there is a big difference. I let him visit this past Christmas week, under supervision of course, but I won't let him take my son anywhere without me present.

I guess the difference is I am not afraid to take this challenge alone. It would be a blessing if Max did have a father figure in his life, however it did not work out that way. I don't yearn for the family that i started because the family we started decided to write us out. Why would i want that back?

There is someone very dear to me that i fear is making a mistake but how do you point that out without crushing her feelings?? She is a single mommy of a baby around Max's age, never married (thank God), but feels the need to let her scumbag run her life? I am not sure whether she is truly in love with him, or if it is just feelings of being alone. I am an outsider looking in so of course if she truly loves him I don't understand because I look on with a biased eye at all he has put her and her young one through.

I guess what i have pulled from this and what i hope that she comes to realize, is not to yearn for the family you started but be grateful for the family that you HAVE right in front of you. The people that really care about you, care about you enough to let you know but love you no matter what choices you make in life. It can be disheartening to be a single parent whether you are a mommy or a daddy but in the end it is about your child not yourself.